Finagan begin Again

So I have been back to the gym. YAY . first time in months (boo) But i have a car now and so my life is starting to get back on track . I just weighed myself yesterday and it was bad 247.2 . more the 12 pounds heavier then i was this time last year. But i cant dwell on that it is offically febuary and it begins now. I am shooting for no less the 3 gym visits a weekI really hope for 4 -5 but we have to start somewhere. and I am going to eat healthier . I know what I have to do this time and I cant be derailed. I mean I'm 22 now for petes sake i have to break this cycle of gaining and losing now or i will struggle for the rest of my life. The good news is that the whole quiting smoking thing is going really well. I have snuck a few cigs on the wekends when im drunk but since im going to be cutting the whole drinking thing waaay down it should not pose much of a problem anymore :)

no rest for the wicked

I honestly thought that tonight would be the night I would sleep like a normal personals its after three in the morning and even though I'm vaguely tired I am still awake. I hope in a couple of days after I have taken the gym intensity up a few notches I can tire myself out enough to sleep at night with the rest of the world...well a girl can dream :). The worst part about not being able to sleep at night is binge eating. I'm tired but bored so I eat to alleviate the boredom and I crave sugar because I am so tired my body wants false energy. Hopefully this sleeping thing fixes itself even though I have been struggling with insomnia for years. Sigh.